you worry? Do you find yourself awake at 3 am, staring at the ceiling, unable
to find a comfortable position and ruminating on what seem to be a thousand
possible scenarios for your life? Or you hear news about a story that’s
happening some place a far distance away in the world and you find yourself
unable to stop thinking about it? Do you have frequent conversations with
someone who says how worried they are about so and so?
This might be you
or someone you know…a worrywart. Not sure? Here’s how Random House Webster’s
Dictionary defines worrywart:
“a person who tends to worry
habitually and often needlessly”.
Earlier this week, I was
speaking to my wise chair-centric yoginis, one woman in her 90’s and the other
in her late 80’s. I asked them if they were “worriers” and they both had
similar replies. “I used to worry, but I’ve learned that it really doesn’t help
anything or make a difference. Whatever happens, happens and worrying about it
won’t prevent that from happening.”
When we worry, our thoughts are
projected into the future. This futuristic thinking is often no more than an
embellished storyline that is getting created in our imagination. What
percentage of what we worry about actually happens? I don’t have stats to back
up this answer, but many people say that a very large percentage of what we
futuristically ponder never happens. NEVER! Wow! That seems to be a
lot of misspent energy.
And according to the definition, worrying is a
habit. That’s right, just like smoking, or over using a word or phrase (like,
ya know), it’s a pattern that is learned. The good news is, if it’s something
we’ve learned, we can un-learn it. The challenge is to recognize when we
actually step into a habitual pattern. We can’t change something that we have
no awareness around, so becoming aware is a huge first step to altering our
behavior.
The definition also states that it is often needless. The
time and energy we direct towards a situation that is completely ineffective to
altering the outcome is wasted time. Life is precious and zooms by so quickly,
so why not convert some of this worrying energy into recognizing what we DO have
the power to control and what we don’t.
I do believe there’s a difference
between worrying about and thinking about something. The worrying element tends
to have a negative pull connected to it, whereas simply thinking about an issue
has a more neutral response. It’s something that we can think about and then
let go. Worriers tend to cling onto the issue, creating higher levels of
anxiety than perhaps the situation actually warrants. And perhaps the act of
worrying is the worrywarts way of showing they care or a way they express their
love for someone or something.
My thought for the week is to turn this
expression of care into self-care by letting go of the charge associated with
worrying, most often over something that we have very little control.
Acknowledge that the uneasy feeling arises, find a breath and another way to be
supportive of the situation. The result could be the lesson of greater freedom
and acceptance. And as the catchy jingle reminds us, “Don’t Worry….Be
Happy”!
