I recently took my first Acroyoga class at Bhakti Fest. Acroyoga is a
mix between Thai yoga massage, yoga and acrobatics. It relies on the basic
principle of trust with one person being the base and the other the flyer. The
experience for the base and the flyer was quite different. As the base, we
needed to be steady, centered and calm. As the flyer, we needed to trust, rely
on the cues from the base and then surrender. Once the flyer let go, the bliss
began to unfold.
This leads me to my thought of the week– how we are in
a constant exchange of energy. We give. We take. But often not in the most
balanced way.
Having my yoga practice housed within a women’s medical
health center means that I see familiar issues amongst many students. One of
the biggest is the amount of energy that women give out to others. It’s as
though the DNA of females has a mighty voice to look after others whether they
be a beloved partner, kids, friends, businesses or social groups. And yet in
the process of doing so, they are often starved of what makes them
flourish.
As a result, these women often stumble into class begging for
savasana (SHA-vah-sana – the final relaxation pose that I offer at
the end of every class). When I ask the question of “what do you need from your
practice today?” one of the most frequent answers is savasana! This response
tells me two things. First, relaxing in a fully supported posture just feels
good. Second, that most people don’t allocate time for themselves to enjoy such
moments. They’re always sending their energy in one direction…out.
If
you take a broader look of the balance of the universe, it is constantly giving
and receiving. Energy flows in two directions…in and out, so if we are always
sending energy away from ourselves, eventually we’ll tip into a state of
imbalance. Sometimes this is so subtle, that we don’t recognize it’s happening
until we’re fried, tired and wired.
Have you ever been in a relationship
that only goes in one direction? You call, email, text or write but rarely
receive anything back? It’s like sitting on one side of a seesaw and expecting
things to move. It won’t. You can give it your energy by sitting on one side
but unless somebody else contributes, you’ll stay sitting in the same place.
It’s like the tango…it takes two.
This can be personal or professional
in its occurrence but it’s always in relation to someone else…often the
relationship we have with ourselves. After awhile of one way energy flow, you
feel as though you’ve been emptying your tank into a black hole of consumption.
You give but never receive and in the process, realize that perhaps this
relationship is no longer serving and supporting your own needs. So what do you
do?
I have come across people who have made conscious choices to clear
the “toxic” relationships out of their lives. Toxic, in my definition, means
shifting away from interactions that don’t feed or meet your needs. By staying
connected it furthers our own suffering; by letting go we begin to remove
obstacles that keep us from being freer in our lives.
Bliss comes with
letting go of what limits us. If a toxic relationship is putting shackles on
our own growth, then maybe it’s time to re-think the give and take. We may be
better at giving than receiving, but either way we need both. Besides, it’s
more fun to seesaw and tango with someone else willing to step into it with
you. Including that all important relationship…the one you have with
yourself.
