During one of my visits to New Delhi, India, I walked past a large poster of Mahatma Gandhi that said, “My life is my message”. I stopped and thought, “Yes…that couldn’t be more perfect”. Some part of me wanted to remember those words so I had my picture taken with it. About a week ago, as I was working on the slideshow for my Mom’s Celebration of Life ceremony, I came across a similar quote by the Buddhist teacher, Thich Nhat Hanh saying, “Our own life has to be the message”. It seemed truly like I once again needed to marinate in this thought and, hence, it became this week’s theme.
It’s so crazy to be able to condense a person’s 88-year long life in a slideshow. It has taken many hours of editing, viewing, and deciding which images represented the life of my Mother. I also asked my three siblings for one word that summed up what her life meant to them. For me, it was kindness. She modeled for me what kindness in action looked like: always remembering birthdays; ensuring that her four kids had an equal number of presents at the holidays; not gossiping; she was a good listener; she collected things for her family that she thought we would treasure; volunteering at a thrift store; she sent boxes of clothing to grandchildren; offered financial support during hard times; didn’t shoot down anyone’s dream of doing something; and she laughed with an open heart. She was a woman of few words yet was able to fully express kindness in action.
We don’t often think about the meaning of our lives as we’re busy simply living them day to day. The beauty of stepping onto our yoga mat is that it’s the perfect forum for us to take time to regularly check in with our purpose and values. It offers us moments of quiet and stillness to reflect and ask ourselves if the current choices we’re making are in alignment with how we wish to be in the world. It has the potential to become a daily act of living consciously, with our highest intentions leading the way. Death is a doorway into contemplation, one we so often try not to open. Yet wouldn’t it be a shame to get to the end of our life and look back with regret for not taking action toward our deepest calling and yearnings?
The author and host of The Slow Home podcast, Brooke McAlary, tells a story about looking at a book of writing prompts and opening to the page where the prompt was to write your own eulogy. She did with great dedication and it altered her life choices. She had two young children and wasn’t sure if how she was currently living was the eulogy she wanted to write about. She became clearer on her “why” of life and made changes. Perhaps if all of us took time to write our own eulogy, we would create a point of focus to keep us on course.
Living with intention takes work and consistency. I liken it to the 23-hour couch potato, where someone who goes to the gym every day for an hour and returns home to a sedentary lifestyle the other 23 hours, often in frustration by the lack of progress in fitness. It’s what we do most of the time that makes a difference, including living from a heart-centered and intentional life. Over the course of your day, what do you spend your time thinking about? What actions do you take throughout the day that are in alignment with your highest values? How are you treating yourself and others? Simply said, it all adds up either to bring greater consciousness to your life or to keep you stuck in un-evolving patterns.
If you want your life to be your message, Gail Brenner (Life is Expressed in our Actions), suggests we can do the following:
- Become aware of fear so it doesn’t divert us
- Identify roles and patterns that aren’t serving
- Listen to our deepest yearnings
- Make decisions with full awareness
- Follow what brings us happiness, joy, love, and true fulfillment
I was going to say there are no words for my Mother’s long life, but there are. It was the message of her life – kindness.
